I'll say!

"He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.
— George Herbert

This blog has been a "work in progress" Celebrating the originals!

It is often said that "Imitation is the purest form of flattery." And that may well be, but it has also been said that "Imitation" never rises to a level of greatness! I know that's true for sure! If you can't come up with your own, better to leave it alone!

I've always taken pleasure in being a maverick, never really followed the crowd, no matter what crowd it was. Part of a "group", nope, close, intimate friends that don't cluster is more my style. On this rollercoaster of a week that my family has been on, the lows have been pretty scary, but we've also shared some laughs, more than a few tears and some outright screaming by one or two of us, (including me, of course, I'm just one of the screamers in my family)! I began this day (Wednesday) writing about what the tears and fears were being caused by, but after reading my Princess Daughter's blog (Tuesday), I was so inspired by the Original Creation that she is, I started thinking about all the Originals that showed up to share the tears, the fears and the laughter of this week, and I want to celebrate them here!

A Celebration of Originals

My father is a part of every moment of my life, he is always very near, in moments of fear, sadness and joy, I feel him in my heart and soul. An original's original. He once gave me a poem to encourage the "Original" he had always seen in Me! Here it is!

Live each day to the fullest
Get the most from each hour
Each day
and each age of your life
then you can look forward
with confidence
and back without regrets

Be Yourself - but be your best self

Dare to be different,
and to follow your own star
and don't be afraid to be happy
enjoy what is beautiful

Love with all your heart and soul
believe that those you love, love you

When you are faced with a decision
Make that decision as wisely as possible
then forget it
the moment of absolute certainty
never arrives
and above all remember that

God Helps Those Who Help Themselves
Act as if everthing depended upon you
and pray as if everthing depends upon God!

Thanks Daddy, I'll do it!

My Mother a/k/a Baba! An original for sure! A drama queen, a spinner of yarns. And, like a lot of mother/daughter relationships, a difficult relationship for me. I watched my Mother sit in a chair all day on Monday, barely moving a muscle, very unusual for my Mother, at 85, she's the livest wire that I know. Once she felt like the danger had passed, she was off and running, once again, causing drama in her wake. My Mother has always lived her life in an original place, all her own, and I can't even come close to understanding that place. While having dinner with her last night (Friday) she decided to "tell me" the story I was "telling her." I guess she had been in my hip pocket and I just didn't know it!

My sister, Carlita, struggling herself, to re-gain her health, after surviving major surgery a month ago that involved having a very large part of her stomach removed. Standing in the sunlight gazing into her eyes this morning (Wednesday), I realized that she not only has Daddy's stomach, which has caused her pain most of her life, she has alot of his good stuff too, a beautiful voice, a talent for piano playing, his intelligence and, she has Daddy's gorgeous blue eyes. Sophisticated, Classy, Intelligent and her own person for sure. A delightful blend of Mother, Daddy and her unique self!

My brother, Edward. Solid, consistent, determined, kind, generous, cute as a button, it wouldn't be possible for me to love him anymore than I already do. One of my heroes, I wouldn't have made it through the way I made it through without him. Edward on the West Coast waiting, calling for reports, ready to do whatever needed to be done at a moments notice.

My brother Gary, boy, talk about original. Tall, blond, blue-eyed, joke telling, dancing, gambling monster. One of the most tender-hearted people I know. Unfortunately, like me, but even more than me, he protects his heart when he shouldn't. We share the same taste when it comes to dressing ourselves, I wonder how many of you will get that.

My blended sister, Penny, just one of the gifts I'm grateful that my step-father brought with him all those many years ago. Exotic, legs up to her shoulders, beautiful skin, a style all her own, that's nothing like any of the rest of us. A brown-eyed girl. And, the sweetest of the bunch.

My blended sister, Pamelita. The sharer of my secrets, more like me then any of the rest and so very different from me at the same time. Tall, gorgeous, a head turner, classy, cool, intelligent. A green-eyed monster, like me. "Green-eyed lady, lovely lady!" One of the great loves of my life. She's been through it all with me and had the guts to refuse to condone a lot of it. One of the bravest people I've ever known, and she's not like anyone else I've ever known. Thank you Pamela for stepping up to the plate this week and being there for my Mother!!!

My blended brother, Paul. What to say about that original? Independent, funny, fun, sensitive, outgoing. Tall, handsome, amazing blue eyes. Chooses to live elsewhere, but always shows up when he needs to! And, he had the good sense to marry a wonderful woman, who is also an original!

My Precious Princess Daughter, the one that started this ball rolling. Tall, beautiful, blond, green-eyed, cool, classy, brilliant, perfection thru and thru! While going through a very big event in her life, I was struggling through her beloved GeGe being admitted to the hospital. She called me with her big news (see www.santasmoon.blogspot.com) another dream of her's that has come true. I couldn't bring myself to tell her about her GeGe, so I didn't. Of course, over the weekend, she discovered what I hadn't told her and Thank God, she understood why I hadn't told her. "Mom, I coming home!" "No, you aren't! GeGe wouldn't want you to see him like this! You need to wait until he's better and at home so you can actually spend some time with him." "But Mom, I feel like a loser for not being there!" "You aren't a loser, no one thinks you 're a loser, everyone in the family loves, respects and admires you! No one would want you to be here seeing GeGe like this! We are all struggling enough already, don't make it worse by showing up and making us worry about Your reaction also." "Ok, Mom." And, while trying to celebrate her own very large news, she's called her Baba everyday, she's called me everyday, more concerned about her Gege then she's been about celebrating herself. You are a very good Princess, my lovely! Congratulations on your new career move! Thank you for bringing Peruna into my life once again, I was worried about you graduating with your Masters in the Spring and me not having access to Peruna. Thanks for taking my worry away! I love that pony!

And last, but certainly not least! The original that brought so many wonderful originals into my life, a man that has made a big difference in my life and an even bigger difference in the life of my Princess Daughter! Tall, handsome, a snappy dresser! A good man, quiet, still, constant! You've pulled through your second open heart surgery and now we all have many good years to look forward to! Thank you for that! I was honored and privileged to hold your hand, bow my head and pray for your safe journey with you and so many other originals that I love so much. God has blessed us all by giving us some more years with You! I love you Geg, I can't wait until you're strong enough to argue!

In the final analysis, I guess my Mother, that I struggle with so much, really does have it all going on. She's responsible for most of these originals being in my life, what a gift she has given me by choosing so very well. Ok, Mom, I'll give you a break as my way of saying thanks. I won't hold you accountable for anything until at least Monday! I love you!

To all the Originals mentioned above, I salute You and I Love You! Thank you for being courageous enough to be an Original and for Not settling for Imitation! I celebrate the Greatness of each of You!

P.S. To CV and Thumper. Thank you for being so present in my life this week. Your calls, good wishes and prayers for me and my family meant so much coming from two very special Originals!

A Celebration of "Freedom"

And I jumped on that freedom, grabbed it around the neck, flung it around in raw, crazy emotion and then hugged it tightly to myself so as to make it a part of my being.

Freedom - we may think we have it because there are no visible chains and no obvious mental control, but freedom is something we feel in our hearts. I know because today my heart soars unbound and overjoyed!!

-Laran O'Neill

I second that Motion Rufus!

http://www.from-rufus.blogspot.com/

Ok! I'll do my best!

"Finish every day and be done with it . . . You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it . . . serenely, and with too high a spirit to be cumbered with your old nonsense.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Quoting, of cours.

"It is by going down into the abyss that we recover the treasures of life. Where you stumble and fall, there lies your true treasure." -- Joseph Campbell

Oh so very true!

There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered. — Nelson Mandela

Happy 4th

"Fake coolness might help in your navigation among and negotiation with people throughout the world, maybe, but it is impossible to meet God with your sunglasses on. It is impossible to meet God without total abandon, without exposing yourself, without being raw and real ... you don't know what's going on behind those glasses half the time, but God, I can assure you, always does." -- Bono

Catching Up!

The Princess and her Prince were in town this past weekend. Friday was a day by the pool and dinner at her Dad's. Here they are Dad and daughter, enjoying some fun in the sun. Hey Larry, have another burger! Oh, and, have you seen that commercial about the guy "striking out" because of his gray hair? I realize life is good, but now really!
The Princess (with her new short hair, which looks adorable on her) and her let's hug sister, Shelly!

Saturday, big southern breakfast at Mom's, Saturday night, a progressive dinner, me and the Princess and her Prince, Tony Madola's to start and on to Vincent's for the main course. Sunday a delicious southern lunch at Mom's and then . . . the Princess and her Prince headed back to their castle in Big D. It was a wonderful weekend!!!!!!! Lot's of Hugs, Kisses and Smiles all around. Oh and, The Princess brought me a couple of books to read, I read the first one "Same Kind of Different as Me" very quickly, and I have to say, it was one of the best books I've ever read. It so gracefully pointed out how we and me so often get it so terribly wrong! A book I think everyone should read at least once and maybe even three or four times, good reminders never hurt! Thanks Princess, that book popped me right between the eyes, and I think I needed a pop! And, of course, as always, when it comes to You, graceful showed up!

A Note to the Princess:

You look marvelous! I love the new do, and your style is impeccable. I don't know how you do it, but you just keep getting better and better! And, I'm so happy that you don't deny yourself handpainted shoes!

Blogging Memories!

The "Princess" in her "Tea Hat"

And, the Princess with a "Spicy Bag" to call her own!

In April, shortly before my previous computer decided to retire, we celebrated the birthday of The Princess with the annual "Honouring the Princess Tea"! The tea was held at a very cute little tea room in Plano, Texas, the stomping grounds of previous generations of our family. (My father graduated from Plano High School). It was a great day for all, good food, good friends, good tea and very good geography (it felt like we were right at home)!

A couple of good quotes!

"The sage seeks freedom from all desire. He does not collect precious things. He learns not to hold on to grand ideas. He continually brings men back to what they have lost."

-- Lao Tzu

"A passion for learning is the beginning of true wealth. It is also the beginning of good health. It is also the beginning of real spirituality."

-- Jim Rohn

And then there's the coolest of the cool!

Now this is for sure true!

"It is wise to direct your anger towards problems - not people; to focus your energies on answers - not excuses. — William Arthur Ward

Doesn't Every Princess have an umbrella to match her Prom Dress?

Clang, Clang, Clang went the trolley . . . Ring, ring, ring went the bell, zing, zing, zing went my heart strings!

I woke up this morning, as I so often do, thinking about my Princess Daughter. Are you wondering why that song would start playing in my head when thinking about my her? Well, because, it was the very first time I saw her take something on that she wanted and work like crazy to get it. Here's the story. Laran was in the 10th grade, crazy high school years, trying out for "officer" of the dance team, a very coveted position. The criteria for tryouts was to dance an original dance, created on your own to the music of your choice, an interview by a panel of judges and to create and dance a dance to 8 counts of a song chosen by the dance director, with the props also chosen by the director. Night after night, I was in captivity in my room (I wasn't allowed to watch her process) while Laran turned the dining room into a dance studio. If I heard that song once, I heard it a thousand times (she only had 3 days to perfect those clang, clang, clangs, Thank God many more clangs and I would have been clanging myself in the head). I wasn't worried about her original dance and certainly not her interview, but that Clang, Clang, Clang thing?????? How is she going to dance to that song? Laran wasn't the strongest dancer on the team and probably not the best politician (something required to be really good in that kind of interview setting), but I knew she would be ok with those things. But what about that clang, clang, clang thing and those props! The day of the tryouts, the only people allowed in the room were the dancers, the judges and the director. The mothers were gathered outside in the courtyard, pacing, chain smoking and wringing their hand. As if trying out wasn’t enough to deal with, all the girls trying out were close friends and there were only 3 spots, some were not going to make it! The horror, the horror! As each girl finished her interview, dance and the 8 count clang, clang, clang, they had to leave the tryout room. Girls that I knew to be either stronger dancers or better politicians then Laran were coming out of that room either throwing up in the bushes or crying their eyes out. The stress of it all completely destroying them. Making it or not making it would determine how the next year looked for them. I'm wringing my hands, thinking to myself, oh my gosh, if these girls are throwing up and crying, Laran will have to be hospitalized (she had been living on Pepto Bismol for weeks, poor thing, she has my Daddy’s tummy, her stress lands there)!
Then it happened, out she came, bag casually thrown over her shoulder, head held high, a smile on her face. I'm looking at her in complete amazement, she was the very picture of Grace and Poise!!!! It's one of the few times my child actually rendered me speechless. I looked at her with a questioning look on my face and she said "I worked as hard as I could, I did the best I could do and that's all that I can do! If I make it great, if I don't, I'll be ok with it because I know I did my best!" Since that day, whenever I know she's facing a tough time or trying to get somewhere she wants to go, or when she has lot's on her plate, or her mother's calling asking her to "be" there for someone else, I see her coming out of that door, bag casually thrown over her shoulder, head held high, the picture of Grace and Poise. And, in my head, I hear, Clang, clang, clang with the trolley . . . because I know that whatever it is, she will get through it with Grace and Poise!

Are you wondering if she was one of the three that “made it”? Absolutely she was! And, I was the MC at the Presentation Banquet that year. Open the envelope please! I had to stand in front of all those girls and all those parents and announce who had made it, without being totally sure that she had. I announced her name and presented her with her Officer Bar!

Zing, Zing, Zing go my heart strings everytime I think about the Princess and her Poise and Grace! The Princess has always given me a reason to believe in Serendipity! Thank you Princess for always being my special Grace!

I listened. . .

I had a rousing conversation with my sister, Rufus, over the weekend. One in which we, at times, had to simply agree to disagree. Being so much alike yet so very different, sometimes the conversations we have, that reveal our differences leave us both at a place of "is it possible that we could feel so different and love each other so much?" Absolutely! Not long after that phone conversation ended, I got another call from her, telling me how she was going to spend the rest of her day, she said, "Before I do this, I need to know if we are ok?" My response, "Absolutely, I'm right, you're wrong, it's all good!" She laughed, I laughed, we hung up and we went on with our day, loving each other all the more!

It's truly never about the "fight" for me, it's about the "inquiry" which sometimes causes fiery words from me and others. Even with "fiery" words, detaching from those that are in the inquiry isn't an option, detaching from those that are in the "fight" is sometimes the only answer!

"Those that fight, can't ever seem to listen; those that listen, don't ever need to fight."
-- Fritz Perls

It's a miraculous ride we're on Rufus and . . . I Love You Madly!

Choose!

"We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them. — Kahlil Gibran

6:00 am, Paradise Cafe

In the depths of winter I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus

Fly Away

I have a friend, whom I love very much who does have a tendency to "Fly Away". I, on the other hand, have a tendency to stomp my foot and leave! The result is the same from both actions, people are left with anger, sadness, confusion and disappointment! Not to mention the fact that when the urge hits to "Fly Away" or stomp your foot and leave, if you do either one, you will miss the lesson that's available to you if you stay!

The chorus of Tim McGraw's new song.....Last Dollar (Fly Away)

And 1..2..3
Like a bird I sing
Cause you've given me
The most beautiful set of wings
And I'm so glad you're here today
Cause tomorrow I might have to go and fly away


I'm never going to let you go again my friend! Thanks for sending me this, you do have a beautiful set of wings, but I am glad you are here today, to fly with me!

Understanding Myself!

I've never been a person that is short on extending forgiveness to others, but, I've always had a difficult time forgiving myself. It's that thing of "what if", what if I'd done this, what if I'd done that! There is no forgiveness for yourself in the re-living of the choices, even if it's just in your own head. Forgiveness is only available for yourself or to extend to others, if you accept what's so! Accepting what's so, and making different choices in the present and the future, creates a clearing for new possibilities. The possibility of a "new and different" kind of chaos, the goal to always be, to learn something from the chaos. At some point, in any chaos, if you have "looked" for and "learned" from the chaos, new chaos actually looks inviting! Here's to new chaos! My stand in the new chaos, to be compassionate, understanding, non-judgemental, and loving, to myself first and to all others, I know that will produce the best and most effective results.

Substance!

"Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow."

Aesop, in The Dog and the ShadowGreek slave & fable author (620 BC - 560 BC)